Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Adoption day (edit)

Yes, they went ahead with the adoption.  That was what was so heartwrenching...when I said that her words didn't matter.  She had to ink her  entire hand in red and stamp the page w/ her hand.   The red ink on her hand was an awful, fright and later she kept staring at the stain.  I can only imagine.  She doesn't want to walk by that office either.  We pass it on the way to the gift shop.  We are heading to the pool so she can swim now.  All is still good this afternoon.  Sorry if I confused any of you by my first post.  So, yes, the adoption is official.


Truly Blessed said...

Oh my word, Sarah! What an emotionally exhausting day you and Meying had. I simply cannot imagine how horrible it was for both of you.

BUT, how lovely that you understand her, you keyed in on the area that matters the most: she wants to be HEARD. There's a fine line in there, trying to let her be heard without allowing her to become overbearing. How I wish you knew the language so you could talk with her without having to go through an interpreter.

I wonder if your guide could talk with the foster mom before the next time Meiying does. Make the FM understand that she needs to assist you in breaking Meiying's dependence on her a little bit. Obviously, I don't know what I'm talking about, I'm not there, but my heart hurts for you, Sarah. It aches for Meiying, but it also aches for you.

What a day. Gee, I hope you get your luggage soon. It sounds like your girl is quite a shop-a-holic and would break the bank if she had the chance!

Jean said...

What an eventful day. I started reading- without my glasses on and couldn't stop- squinting through you post. It really brings back memories of our time with Sarah in China. You are doing such a good job putting Meiying's needs first. It is unbelievable what these children have gone through in their short lives. You have a wonderful godly perspective and you are an awesome Mom!! I think you perception of your new daughter is right on!

I remember the advice of a veteran parent when we where in China. She said "keep everyone as happy as can be in China and get home as quick as you can" We did a lot of shopping too- try hair ties, headbands, etc
God Bless you!
You are awesome!!

Reena said...

Oh, how very hard this must be for her. I think your are right to allow her to call her F-mom when she wants to. So much has been taken from her. Be prepared, at some point she might also feel anger toward her F-mom for letting this happen. Life is so black and white to kids-- compared to all the gray we see as adults.

You are doing fabulously!!!

Big Hug!

Catching Butterflies 3 said...

I'm sorry it was such a drama for her. I'm sorry she felt no power in it all...but also glad. If she was really allowed to say no, then what would her future hold? I guess her life was OK in China (a foster family), but I'm sure it will be so much better with your family! I can sure understand the fear. Sarah (our Chinese daughter) would have said no to me. She did reject me for months and months. But her life is wonderful, and rich, and full! She just didn't know what was ahead. Who could blame them? I'm so happy for you! You are a great mom!